I had #HIO and it really stopped me in my tracks! Looking back I realize I had #HIO for almost all of my life, yet I didn’t know it, for me that WAS normal. Constant colds, sinus infections and so many allergies. I was always in a sort of fog and never really was glowing in health. Sure I ate ‘healthy’ at least I thought I did. I worked out 3-4 times a week. Yet deep down I had #HIO.
I took a job that I knew would be tough and un-glamourous, but I knew the industry paid well and that’s what I went for. I worked around the clock and allowed my self care to drop more and more.
I also had mom guilt. I went back to work and my baby was so tiny. She wanted to nurse at night, she missed me in the day. She didn’t know that she arrived in the middle of the 21st century in a country where most parents have to work. It wasn’t her fault that I had to leave her all day with someone else, no, she was just a tiny little human, who wanted her mommy. So I nursed on demand, when I was home and pumped when I wasn’t for there.
Sleep was rare, and sleep more than 4 hours straight had not happened for me in over two years. It was the kind of state where I could hold it all together, yet if someone asked me if I was okay, That kind of caring could cut right through my façade like a knife and I’d want to burst into tears at any moment.
When I looked into the mirror, my skin was so old looking, and I wasn’t even yet 30. I remember my mom telling me that was normal after a kid. # HIO was becoming more and more prevalent in my life, I was so tired, I wanted to nap daily. I wondered what things would be like for me in my 30’s, 40’s, 50’s, life in this body felt so hard now.
Then it got worse.
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